In the world of entertainment, Kim Kardashian needs no introduction. From reality TV stardom to her diverse business ventures, she has become a pop culture icon. But apart from her successful career, Kim Kardashian has also been the subject of countless jokes and memes. In this article, we will explore the lighter side of Kim Kardashian and present you with an assortment of 73+ hilarious jokes that will have you laughing out loud!
Meet Kim Kardashian: A Comedic Funny Profile
- Kim’s Glamorous Life: Kim Kardashian is so glamorous that even her grocery shopping looks like a fashion runway!
- Endless Selfies: Kim takes so many selfies that if they were printed, we could pave a road from New York to Los Angeles!
- Keeping Up with Kim: With the Kardashians, it’s not about keeping up with the Joneses anymore—it’s all about keeping up with Kim’s ever-changing hairstyles!
- Breaking the Internet: Remember when Kim’s infamous “break the internet” photoshoot happened? Well, it crashed the internet so hard that even the Matrix would have been impressed!
- Kim and the Paparazzi: Kim Kardashian and paparazzi have a love-hate relationship—she loves them when they make her look good and hates them when they catch her off-guard!
- Kimojis: Kim’s emojis are so famous that aliens from distant galaxies probably use them in their texts!
- Marriage Stories: Kim’s marriages are so short that her wedding cake is often bigger than the marriage itself!
- Keeping It Simple: Kim Kardashian’s idea of “keeping it simple” would put a NASA rocket launch to shame!
- Contouring Queen: Kim’s contouring skills are so on point that she could probably contour her way out of a maze!
- Unforgettable Outfits: Kim’s fashion choices are so unforgettable that her dresses have their own paparazzi following them around!
One-Liners Kim Kardashian Jokes for Instagram
- “I told Kim Kardashian that her selfies could power the entire city. She just replied with a wink emoji and said, ‘I’m a renewable energy source!'”
- “Why did Kim Kardashian start her own makeup line? So she could contour her way into our hearts!”
- “If Kim Kardashian was a vegetable, she’d be ‘Glamourrots’—always in the spotlight!”
- “Kim Kardashian and procrastination have one thing in common—they both love putting things off until the last contour!”
- “Kim Kardashian’s closet is like a black hole—once something goes in, it never comes out!”
- “Kim Kardashian’s favorite math subject? Geometry, because she’s all about those angles!”
- “Kim Kardashian’s autobiography should be titled ‘From Selfies to Self-Made: A Glamorous Journey!'”
- “Why did Kim Kardashian become a lawyer? To sue anyone who said she can’t contour!”
- “What did Kim Kardashian say when asked about her secret to success? ‘It’s all about finding the right filter!'”
- “Kim Kardashian is so good at multitasking that she can take a selfie while signing a business deal!”
- “Why did Kim Kardashian never pursue a career in music? Because her true talent is hitting the high notes with her contour brush!”
- “Kim Kardashian’s cat got lost, and she put up ‘Lost Cat’ posters with her cat’s most glamorous selfie!”
- “Kim Kardashian’s morning routine includes more steps than the moon landing!”
- “If Kim Kardashian ever starts a fitness regime, she’ll call it ‘Workout Couture’!”
- “Kim Kardashian’s passport photo looks like a high-fashion magazine cover!”
- “Kim Kardashian should open a bakery because she’s the queen of making perfect ‘glam-cakes’!”
- “What’s Kim Kardashian’s favorite type of humor? Witty contour-jokes, of course!”
- “Kim Kardashian’s favorite party game? Pin the contour on the celebrity!”
- “When Kim Kardashian goes on vacation, her suitcase needs a separate one just for her contour palettes!”
- “Kim Kardashian’s fashion sense is so out-of-this-world that NASA wants to launch her wardrobe into space!”
Funny Jokes About Kim Kardashian
- Why did Kim Kardashian never become a magician? Because her contouring secrets are the only thing she never reveals!
- Kim Kardashian and her closet walk into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we’re at full capacity—no black holes allowed!”
- Kim Kardashian’s fortune-teller predicted that she’d be a global star. Turns out, she misread the crystal ball—it said “glam star”!
- How does Kim Kardashian take her coffee? With a pinch of contour and a sprinkle of stardust!
- What’s Kim Kardashian’s favorite bedtime story? “Sleeping Beauty’s Guide to Glamorous Dreams”!
- Kim Kardashian tried to audition for a comedy show, but her jokes were all about contouring. The judges said, “Sorry, no shape-shifting allowed!”
- Why did Kim Kardashian start her own line of perfumes? So she could bottle the scent of fame and spray it everywhere she goes!
- Kim Kardashian once went on a camping trip, but she brought so much makeup that she turned the wilderness into a beauty salon!
- What do you call a selfie taken by Kim Kardashian’s cat? A ‘Kitty-glamour’!
- Kim Kardashian’s dream vacation spot? The contour-ntinental drift!
- How does Kim Kardashian handle a crisis? With a selfie, of course—she believes a good pose can fix anything!
- Kim Kardashian’s favorite exercise? The ‘glam plank’—holding a pose for an entire photoshoot!
- Why did Kim Kardashian join a rock band? She wanted to contour to the beat!
- Kim Kardashian’s shopping strategy: “Buy now, decide later—contouring decisions are always better made on the go!”
- Kim Kardashian’s cat became famous too—it has its own ‘purrsonal’ stylist!
- What’s Kim Kardashian’s favorite dessert? Contour pudding—it always leaves her looking radiant!
- Why did Kim Kardashian never become a pilot? She’s already flying high in the fashion world!
- Kim Kardashian was once asked what she’d do if she wasn’t famous. She replied, “Be a secret agent—because contouring is all about hiding the truth!”
- What’s Kim Kardashian’s favorite board game? Monoglam-y!
- Kim Kardashian’s favorite pick-up line? “Are you a contour brush? Because I can’t blend in without you!”
Story Jokes About Kim Kardashian
- Kim Kardashian was invited to a costume party, and she went as a contour palette. She looked so fabulous that people couldn’t recognize her at first—she was the ultimate ‘glamouflage’!
- Once, Kim Kardashian’s phone got hacked, and the hacker found only one thing—a thousand selfies, each with a different contour!
- Kim Kardashian’s cat tried to follow her makeup tutorial, and the result was a hilarious ‘cat-contour’ look that went viral!
- Kim Kardashian once had a dream that she was stuck in a world without makeup. She woke up screaming, “No contour, no life!”
- Kim Kardashian tried to do a stand-up comedy routine, but she accidentally picked up a contour brush instead of a microphone. The audience loved it—they said her jokes were ‘blending’ perfectly!
Key Takeaway
In a world where laughter is the best medicine, Kim Kardashian’s larger-than-life persona has provided endless comedic fodder. From her glamorous lifestyle to her makeup mastery, these jokes celebrate the humor in the world of Kim K. So the next time you need a dose of laughter, remember these jokes and let Kim Kardashian add some glamour to your day!
