103+Hilarious Prison Jokes to Set You Free

Are you ready to break out of the monotony and burst into laughter? Well, get ready to serve a sentence of uncontrollable giggles as we present you with a side-splitting collection of prison jokes! While prison may not seem like the obvious setting for humor, we’ve discovered that even behind bars, laughter finds its way through the iron bars and into the hearts of inmates. From clever one-liners to funny anecdotes, these jokes will have you chuckling and escaping the seriousness of life. So, grab a seat, hold onto your handcuffs (or not!), and get ready for a riotous ride through these prison-themed jokes!

Best Prison Jokes:

  • Why did the scarecrow become a prison guard? Because he was outstanding in his field!
  • Why did the math book end up in prison? It couldn’t stop multiplying its problems!
  • What did the grape say when it got stepped on in the prison yard? Nothing, it just let out a little whine!
  • How do prisoners stay motivated? They set goals behind bars!
  • Why was the new prison guard always cold? He couldn’t find the right cell to turn up the heat!
  • Why was the computer cold in jail? It left its Windows open!
  • Why don’t prisoners like to play cards in jail? There are too many cheaters behind bars!
  • How do inmates take their coffee? With a cell phone, of course – it’s their daily grind!
  • What do you call a musician in jail? A con-artist!
  • Why did the prisoner break out his guitar? He wanted to escape the blues!
  • How do inmates send letters? Through the “Cell Mail” service!
  • Why did the scarecrow go to prison? It was accused of stalking crows!
  • How do prisoners make phone calls? With their cell phones – they’re well-connected!

One-Liner Prison Jokes:

  • Prison is just one big soap opera – inmates can’t avoid the drama!
  • Why did the protractor get arrested? It was caught trying to measure up to society’s angles!
  • How do prisoners stay in shape? They exercise their right to remain silent!
  • What’s a prisoner’s favorite instrument? The cell-o!
  • How do inmates organize their lives? They make jail-timetables!
  • Why did the tomato turn red in prison? It saw the salad dressing!
  • How do prisoners stay positive? They find the key to happiness, even in captivity!
  • Why was the prisoner always a happy camper? Because they knew how to pitch a tent!
  • How do inmates listen to music? They use the bars to pick up the beat!
  • What did the prison barber say to the new inmate? “Take a seat – we’ll give you a short back and sides, just like your sentence!”
  • How did the computer break out of jail? It hacked the cell lock code!
  • Why did the prisoner refuse to play hide-and-seek? They were tired of hiding from their mistakes!
  • How do prisoners escape? They make a “con”-venient getaway!
  • Why did the snail end up in prison? It was caught slowly escaping from a crime scene!
One-Liner Prison Jokes

Funny Jokes About Prison:

  • Why did the prison chef always win the cooking contest? They knew how to serve hard time!
  • What do you call a prison that only serves dessert? A “con”-fectionery!
  • Why did the musician go to jail? He got caught stealing hearts with his melodies!
  • What’s a prisoner’s favorite game? Cell-ebrity Charades!
  • Why was the computer mouse sent to prison? It couldn’t stop clicking with the wrong crowd!
  • How do prisoners stay fit? They do “jailhouse rocks” in the exercise yard!
  • Why did the prisoner feel like a bird? He had barred windows and wanted to fly away!
  • What do you call a prison chef’s cookbook? “The Con-Fidential Cuisine”!
  • How do prisoners pass the time? With “cell-fies” – documenting life behind bars!
  • What do you call a prison with no walls? Escapable!
  • How do prisoners watch movies? On “cell-u-lar” devices, of course!
  • Why did the math book get arrested too? It was the accomplice of the criminal mastermind!
  • How do inmates cope with stress? They meditate – it’s called “con-centration”!
  • What do you call a prison library? A “readjustment center”!

Crazy Jokes For Prison:

  • Why was the prisoner so good at hide-and-seek? He knew how to “cell” his hiding spots!
  • What did one cellmate say to the other? “I’ve got bars, too – but they’re on my phone!”
  • How do prisoners handle anger management classes? With “con-trolled” emotions!
  • Why was the sandwich sent to jail? It was caught loafing around the deli!
  • How do inmates handle secrets? They keep them “locked” away!
  • What’s a prisoner’s favorite superhero? The “Masked Avenger” – their cellmate!
  • How do prisoners tell jokes? With a “cell-u-lar” sense of humor!
  • Why did the prisoner always have money in jail? He had a life sentence – in a Monopoly game!
  • What do you call a haunted prison? A “cell-ar” full of spooky tales!
  • How do inmates travel in prison? On the “cellular express” – it’s a wild ride!
  • Why was the fish sent to jail? It was swimming in “pirate” territory!
  • How do prisoners become skilled artists? They have plenty of “con-vict-ion” in their craft!
  • What do prisoners do during karaoke night? They belt out “cell”-ebrity impersonations!
  • How do inmates relax in prison? They have a “cell-tastic” spa day!
  • Why did the prisoner feel like a book? He had a hardcover – a tough exterior but filled with wisdom!
Funny Jokes About Prison

Hilarious Jokes On Prison:

  • How do inmates share secrets? Through the “cell”-ular grapevine!
  • How do prisoners make their beds? With “cell”-sheets, of course!
  • What did the judge say to the guilty sandwich? “You’re sentenced to a lifetime in a sandwich bag!”
  • How do prisoners write letters? With invisible ink – to keep their correspondence “con”-fidential!
  • Why did the prisoner become a musician? He had a life sentence, so he learned to play the “cell”-o!
  • How do inmates take their coffee? With “cell”-ery sticks, of course – for a balanced prison diet!
  • Why did the bakery owner go to jail? He couldn’t keep his “roll” in check!
  • How do prisoners express themselves? Through “cell”-f expression art!
  • Why was the prison library always empty? It was the “quietest” place to escape!
  • How do inmates share jokes? Through the “cell”-phone’s messaging app!
  • Why did the computer crash in prison? It was trying to download freedom.exe!
  • How do prisoners measure time? With a “cell”-endar, of course!
  • Why did the music teacher go to jail? He got caught “rapping” with a dangerous crowd!
  • How do inmates celebrate birthdays? With “cell”-ebratory cakes and a jailhouse party!


In conclusion, laughter is the key to unlocking joy even in the most challenging situations. These prison jokes have shown us that humor knows no boundaries, not even prison bars. From witty one-liners to clever punchlines, these jokes will keep you grinning like a free man. So, the next time you need a break from the seriousness of life, remember these hilarious prison jokes to set yourself free from the mundane. Remember, humor has the power to transcend any walls or cells, so keep sharing the laughs and spreading the joy. Now, if you want more jokes, laughter, and entertainment, head over to our website, where we have a treasure trove of humor waiting for you. Keep laughing, and never forget that life may have its prisons, but laughter is the ultimate escape!

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